Love in Speech
[You must speak] without any frivolity, but with prudence, selflessness and moderation. (OOCC, XI, p. 321)
When love is under the safeguard of humility, it expresses itself graciously through a person’s speech. Since what a person thinks and feels is expressed through speech, the nature of love that is characteristic of a person can be discerned from his speech. According to St. Vincent Pallotti a person’s speech must be without any frivolity for it must be prudent, selfless and moderate. First, a person’s speech must be without any frivolity. A person’s speech must not contain anything unsubstantial, i.e., it should not be meaningless chatter or gabbing. As a speech of this type is not serious in nature, it does not build genuine and loving communication between persons. Second, a person’s speech must be prudent. A prudent speech consists in saying the right thing, in the right way, at the right time. It is a speech that comes after serious reflection and thought. A prudent speech can build bridges between persons. Third, a person’s speech must be selfless. A person of selfless speech does not think of himself while he speaks, but rather it is other-centered and looks for the good of the other. Hence, his speech is aimed at bringing good to the other. Fourth, a person’s speech must be moderate. Moderation is the mean between extremes of excess and defect. Thus a moderate speech does not err either by defect or by excess. Such speech is pleasing to the listener. When a person’s speech bears all these four qualities, St. Vincent felt it would truly be flowing from a heart that genuinely loves and cares for his neighbor.
Do I express love in and through my conversation with others? Is my speech meaningless chatter? Am I prudent in my speech? Am I truly selfless in conversation to and about people? Am I a person of moderate speech?
Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you know how you should respond to each one. (Col. 4: 6)